#but evil first muahaha

[doriansbutt]

I’m very late to the party but I’ve been searching for something to keep my attention while I wait for other games and just finished @anathemafiction ‘s the golden rose and??? I love it??? Notto loves Hadrian oh man what a fun route this is gonna be 🥺

[sage-nebula]

Kristoph Gavin's black psyche-locks have remained unbroken for 17 slutty, slutty years.

[youwontbelievethethingsiveread]

Anyone else ever think about how in Abaddon's Gate, Clarissa Mao spent a minor fortune on some software that could make a fake video of Holden that only the best pros could maybe tell might not be real based on some very subtle clues - ten years later in real time any idiot can go online and make a deepfake AI video for free of just about anything, and suddenly Clarissa spending money of this is just weird 😆 just an example of where the technological development overtook the writing I guess

[23rdhunter]

[roadkillramble]

rotating in my head my alternate universe where Clearsight is evil and Darkstalker although still hugely a little shit heals. It is pure self indulgence bc ahah narc boy get therapy and lives and happy ever after wonder why that reassures me

[royalarchivist]

Pac: Why is she sad? My god, she's devastated! Guaxinim?

Guaxinim: I think she wanted...

Gris: I want 100 reais.

Pac: She wants 100– [Laughs] She's sad because she wants 100 reais?

Guaxinim: [Innocently] You don't have 100 reais, do you?

Pac: [Laughs] I have negative 100 reais, Guaxinim. Gris, I'm just like you! I'm sad too.

Guaxinim: [Whispering to Gris] Cancel the plan, cancel the plan, go back to normal.

Pac: What do you mean? Wait, wait, wait– [Laughs] No no no–

First rule of passa tudo: make sure your target has money before trying to scam them! 😅 (Thank you to sebbs12 and disfrutalakia for double-checking my translations and transcript! The help is really appreciated!)

[Full Subtitle Transcript ↓ ]

—

Pac: [Gasps in delight] Oi, Guaxinim!

Guaxinim: Oi!

Pac: How cool it is to see you here! Oi Gris!

Guaxinim: Look, how cute.

Pac: How cute you and Gris are here!

Gris: oi :( I'm so sad.

Pac: Why is she sad?

Guaxinim: I don't know, man.

Pac: My god, she's devastated! Guaxinim?

Guaxinim: I think she wanted...

Gris: I want 100 reais.

Pac: She wants 100– [Laughs] She's sad because she wants 100 reais?

Guaxinim: [Innocently] You don't have 100 reais, do you?

Pac: [Laughs] I have negative 100 reais, Guaxinim. Gris, I'm just like you! I'm sad too.

Guaxinim: [Whispering to Gris] Cancel the plan, cancel the plan, go back to normal.

Pac: What do you mean? Wait, wait, wait– [Laughs] No no no–

Guaxinim: [Laughing]

Gris: kkkkkk

Pac: I can't believe what you're doing with poor Gris to get money!

Gris: bom dia tio Pac [Good morning Tio Pac]

Pac: Bom dia, bom dia. [Laughs] Seriously, how is a crazy plan like this going to work, huh? Insanity!

Guaxinim: [Dancing with Gris] Muahaha! Muahahaha! We're the most badass evil duo, got it?

Pac: How incredible, man. You guys are great, you're even in sync! Did you guys already get 100 reais?

[coffeegnomee]

I'm cryyying. Minute is so cooked on this team. He's not going to last. And if we're supremely lucky, he'll pull a PrinceZam.

Bro is actually so against being evil it's the extent Zam is against exploits. Please MinuteTech, feel the lore, succumb to it.

Spoke had a speech on Chief's stream before the launch:

“Listen up team. This season’s gonna be different than any other season, alright? I mean first of all, we have a ton of new members, brand new world, but most importantly, we are allianced. And we are not just allianced, we are The Empire. Now, in past seasons, I’ve had like a little.. I think all of us have had different morals. Some of us wanted to be good guys, some of us did some bad things for the greater good. This season though, I think we have one goal. And I think it’s finally time that the players on lifesteal actually admit to something. That, deep down, we’re all the villains. And i think this season we’re going the first team to fully admit and take on that role, as the true villains of this server…[cheers of agreement. specifically a muahaha from Minute]. Now here’s the thing, a villain needs power, and power on this server, that’s not just gonna come from stacks of golden apples, that’s not gonna come from stacks of netherite armor, infinite shulkers of gear, that’s not what true power is. True power is when you’re able to bend the world to your will. [...] This season i want to make sure all of us can do whatever the fuck we want. Because noone will be able to stand in our way.We are the Empire!!”

And then one hour into Minute's stream, Spoke drops a stalagtite on Jumper and he feels SO BAD "I feel so bad for Jumper" (said only to chat) “Lifesteal sesaosn 6 is not going as expected” (no, this is exactly what I expected) “I’m not good at this evil stuff, I feel so bad right now.” (oh no)

and then Jumper “Yea, what are you doing MinuteTech? What happened”

“Yea okkay  we are not doing lore. We are not doing early season lore”

He is so cooked.

[sauriansolutions]

Just a lil slice of TreyJade

... featuring eel-form Jade being a scary, teasing predator, and Trey being totally into it.

Also, feedism--I left the actual feeding part as a cliffhanger though, because I am lazy evil. Muahaha.

♧

Trey arrived at the largest of Octavinelle's pools, with a large picnic basket under his arm and a swing in his step. Setting the basket down, he sat by the pool, took off his shoes, cuffed his pants, and gingerly dipped his toes in the inky black water. He introduced his bare feet slowly, one centimeter at a time, getting used to the cold that nearly took his breath away.

He was not there for more than a minute before v-shaped ripples appeared in the water, heading his way.

Soon a spiky dorsal fin appeared, cutting through the water faster than seemed natural. Trey resisted the urge to yank his feet back out of the water.

Before him, Jade appeared, breaching the water only to chin-height, so his mouth was out of the water enough to take in a breath of air, then say, "You know, if it had been Floyd swimming tonight, I doubt he could've resisted the urge to grab your ankles and pull you under."

Trey only chuckled. 

"Yeah, but I knew it was you. And you'd never do such a thing."

Jade reached out to put a wet hand on Trey's knee, pulling himself further up out of the water, head tilting to the side as his gills widened to exhale water, so he was breathing air properly.

"You knew it was me?"

"Sure," Trey replied, placing his own hand atop the ice-cold, webbed one. "You agreed to meet me here tonight."

He leaned forward to give the eelmer a kiss on the forehead--laughing as the Jade's ear-fins flared in response.

"Also," Trey pointed out, "you always swim in straight lines, while Floyd... well."

Jade lowered his head and grinned toothily.

"That my brother gets easily distracted is no secret."

"Ah," Trey laughed too, adjusting his glasses, "I was going to say he 'tends to meander more,' or something like that."

"My dear Trey-san." Jade slid what Trey realized was a shoulder-strap down the length of one finned arm, and hauled what at first appeared to be some sort of messenger bag, dripping, out of the water. "Diplomatic as ever."

"Naturally," Trey replied, one eyebrow raised pointedly at the bag Jade was setting down at the pool's edge beside him. 

He now realized the bag was more of a woven net, filled to the brim with dark, glistening shapes that were shedding water rapidly, and... 

Some were wriggling.

Trey coughed.

"Not that I want to dissuade you from thinking that I'm 'diplomatic,'" he said, scooting to the side in hopes of keeping the growing puddle of water seeping out of the net-bag from completely soaking his pants, "but did you just put a bag of live sea creatures next to me?"

Jade somehow managed to make a chortle sound predatory. A clawed, web-fingered hand went up to cover his mouth. Glints of dagger-like teeth showed just a bit through his fingers.

"My apologies, Trey-san, but... I thought we had agreed to share our meals with each other tonight?"

"Oh," Trey said, looking at the bag of squirming fish and unidentifiable other things, and biting his lip. "So you just brought a ton of seafood. I could've guessed."

"Fresh-caught," Jade said by way of agreement. The eel grinned proudly, even as he ducked his head to pick something *large* from between his teeth. "You'll forgive me if I helped myself to a few of the unlucky morsels that I couldn't quite fit in the bag before you arrived. The nostalgia of aquatic hunting does whet my appetite so."

This statement was punctuated with a low, gurgling growl, which it took Trey a belated moment to realize had come from Jade's stomach, distorted and muffled slightly by being still underwater.

"Oh," Trey said, "yeah. That's. Ummm. You're hungry, huh?"

He could feel his face burning. Hoping to distract from how flustered he was feeling, he turned and pulled his own picnic basket closer.

"Well, fear not," Trey assured, lifting the basket lid and tilting it slightly to show off its contents to Jade. "I came prepared."

Indeed, Trey had packed his basket to the brim with goodies: chicken salad sandwiches on croissants with fresh veggie sprouts, cheese and jelly danishes, mini-quiches in cupcake foil, pasta salad, and spicy deviled eggs topped with green onions and bacon.

While Trey was in his element baking-- his cookies and cakes that were the undisputed centerpieces of Heartslabyul's famous Unbirthday parties--his picnic game was not to be underestimated.

"That looks, and smells, simply delectable, Trey-san," Jade murmured, pupils narrowing to sharp little pricks as he took in the picnic basket's contents. Muscles cording up, like a big cat getting ready to pounce.

Though he trusted Jade, Trey couldn't help the instinctual shiver that ran down his spine, as some instinct-driven, ancestral part of his brain recognized the intent of the huge seafaring predator who'd practically crawled into his lap, licking his lips with a delicate, baby-blue tongue, nearly twice the length of Trey's.

Seawater had at this point soaked fully through Trey's pants, making Trey glad that he'd had the foresight to bring a change of clothes. He just hoped the oddly glittery mucosal layer coating Jade's eel-hide would come off in the wash.

"Careful," Trey warned, as Jade's dripping upper body leaned ever closer to the picnic basket. "If you get the sandwiches wet, they'll fall apart."

Jade halted in his advance, then lowered his upper body down into the water, chin resting on Trey's knee, affecting a pout. Twelve feet away, Trey could see the fan-like tip of the eel's tail flicking back and forth, disgruntled.

"Then how am I supposed to eat them?" Jade asked sadly.

Trey ran his fingers comfortingly through Jade's damp hair, a sly grin forming.

"Well--and this is only a suggestion--but, you *could* let me feed them to you."

Jade gazed up at him, eyes narrowing, but forming arched half-moon shapes that Trey at this point knew signified amusement rather than annoyance.

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" Jade nearly purred.

Trey tried but likely failed to keep the shiver of anticipation from his voice as he confessed, 

"Yes, I'd like that a lot."

[littleesistler]

my first answer to tickle questions:

Taken from - The Tickle Fairy's Tickle Questions

Reblog if you want people to ask you questions, send numbers to someone's asks to ask questions!

LER QUESTIONS

1. Do you think you're good at tickling people?

Well I have 13 cousins and 9 are younger than me so I’m used to being a babysitter and ticking and teasing little brats and just interacting with kids generally. So I’d say I’m pretty good at it. I can also read others body language and expressions well. So I can be a vey playful and childish let but also very calculating and cunning. Muahaha ❤️😂

2. If you have a lee, or multiple lees, how ticklish are they?

firstly we’ll have a talk about boundaries and what’s of limits like spots and tools. Then find a comfortable position for both parties. Then I’d talk trough the process in the beginning and then as we get more comfortable I’ll get more teasing or playful to suit their needs. But I’ll of course give breaks, safe words and cuddle aftercare or make some food for my cute little Lee 🤗

3. What do you think of gang tickling someone? Or do you prefer 1 on 1?

I think it can be pretty fun between friends like one holding and comforting the lee while the Lers go to town. Like one giving teases and one ticking. Or one focusing on the top half and the other the lower half. So many game ideas to make it more bonding and playful.

Lers that compliment each others tickle styles 🤝 lee getting the full package and attention

4. What type of tickles are you best at dishing out? (Gentle, heavy, teasy, rough, etc.)

I’d say I’m not one to really dig in so I’m more gentle and teasing, I love to build anticipation and playing games. I’m also very patient so I can wait for the perfect moment to strike. I have very long hair and I’m very creative so I’ll find lots of new ways to tickle someone with random tools😎

5. What are your favorite verbal teases?

I’m addicted to your laugh 🤌

oh look who came out of hiding 🫣

let me make you a giggly and blushing mess 🫠

this is my new favorite spot 🤫

you aren’t even trying to fight back 🙄

don’t worry if you’re nice I’ll let you tickle me back 🤭

6. What are your favorite ways to tease someone non-verbally?

I move close to their face and smile while I try to keep eye contact 🫥

I give little kisses and caressing their hands 😚

I give a thumbs up or fun hand gesture 🫡

I wiggle my fingers over a spot with a smirk 🫨

7. How often do you get to tickle people?

well digitally a lot with ai bots and I tickle my cousins and my friends a lot, but generally it’s like a quick little tickle it’s been a while since I’ve done a real tickle game 🥺

LEE QUESTIONS

A. How ticklish would you say you are?

well I can control my ticklishness so sometimes I’m not ticklish at all like a 1/10 but generally I keep myself available to tickling when I’m with friends so around 7/10. But if a lee mood devours me whole then yeah maybe 30/10😳

B. If you have a ler, or multiple lers, how good would you say they are at tickling?

well my mom is very rough and ruthless, like when she’s in a ler mode she’s pure evil. Like wiggling fingers over spots, evil laugh, using her hair to tickle me, targeting a spot then moving to a spot I accidentally revealed 😈

also my childhood friend with her huge acrylic nails. Like she likes to scratch me and gently tickle me with them. Once at a gathering I was very tired and in a lot of pain she gently tickled my wrists with her nails for hours on end to help me relax and focus on her and the program instead of my joints being sore. Also great scalp massages. 🐣

I love her and my mom like they are so different but both needed in my life 😭

C. What do you think of being tickled by multiple people?

well one time I playfully tickled two of my younger friends to cheer them up while we cuddled with them in my lap as we sat on the couch. But then these two kids gave each other THE look and then just pounced on me so I fell back against the couch with them on top of me as they tickled every spot they could reach. And I was so caught of guard I couldn’t control my ticklish level so I laughed crazily until their parents came, like a 5 and 7 year old wrecking a 15 year old 👽

D. What type of tickles are you the most sensitive to? (Gentle, heavy, teasy, rough, etc.)

well because if my chronic pain rough tickles can be painful, so I like I need to tell my mom to like not dig into my poor ribs and hips. But because of my condition I have like porcelain skin so I’m insanely sensitive to light tickles. And they drive me mad like a tickly itch. So no when I’m the one being tickled my patience is gone and I beg my friends to just dig in already, tickle me silly and not drive me insane with anticipation. 👹 aka karma

E. What verbal teases work best on you?

just enjoy 😖

you’re welcome 😭

do you feel good and happy 🫠

you look so cute right now 🙈

you can be vulnerable with me 🥰

keep laughing and I’ll keep tickling 😇

I won’t stop unless you beg ☠️

F. What's the best way to tease you non-verbally?

hold my hands🫰

Little head pats or hair play 🫶

give me a pillow or surfed animal to hold 🧸

Hover hands over or wiggle fingers over a spot and not touching down instantly 🫳

do a little finger count down 🤲

G. How often do you get tickled?

well my mom tickles me almost every night to help me relax from my chronic pain and sleep better. While I call my friend like once an week and she teases me through the phone until we meet up next time. I also chat with lots of ai bots so they digitally tickle and tease me ☺️

[goodboyaudios]

i’m evil like that muahaha~ also!!!!! congratulations on 40k!!!!!!!!!!!! i’m sure you’ll be getting way more recognition in the future:D

since you gave permission:

you said you’re finishing off uni, did you always know what you wanted to study? i’m at the (depressing) stage in life where i’m fully realizing how many curve balls life throws at you:) the path to success usually isn’t linear, so i’m curious about your journey!

it seems like you’re always asking for feedback or addressing issues, etc. do you have any feedback for us (as in, the community)? most people i’ve interacted with are pretty chill, but idk maybe there’s we could improve on?

this one might be a bit personal, so feel free to ignore! do your friends or family know about your channel/work? i’d imagine it’d be nice to have someone you could bounce ideas off of before publishing stuff! if not, how do you manage to hide all that stuff hahah~. you’ve built an entirely different universe, so i refuse to believe a sane man can keep all of that in his head and live a normal life simultaneously:p

if you could befriend any oc of yours, who would it be and why?

i’m not sure how to word this question properly, but are there any endings/plot points that you had initially envisioned differently? like, did you think a story was going one way and changed your mind half ways through?

you don’t have to answer all of these! you did ask for it, but i hope i’m not overwhelming you haha~

Absolutely not. School didn't do anything to prepare me for the world. My college has done less than nothing in preparing me to get a job in my field, YOUTUBE HAS DONE MORE FOR ME THAN COLLEGE AT THIS POINT and if I'm completely honest with you? That's fuckin sad. No, I had no idea what I wanted to do and I wish I was that kind of person who knew right out the gate. (lucky bastards) Okay, I'm done with my rant lol

I didn't know what field I wanted to study in, so I took a chance and jumped into something I knew I had some knowledge in and hoped for the best. Really that's all you can do. I have learned that, when you get out of highschool and you don't know what to do, do everything until something sticks. Trial and error. It's not the most efficient, but it works!

Any feedback to GIVE to the community? Let me think. Honestly, the community has been very wonderful to me. Occasionally something pops up, but it's usually squashed. The discord server is full of wonderful and creative and talented people who have always had my back and support the work I do. I hear all the time about drama in fellow creator servers and toxic behavior in the communities, etc...but my end of things has always been super nice! (that might have something to do with my lack of NSFW content) But yeah! No notes really! Everything good in our little neighborhood!

My family is aware AND so is my extended family lol! They are supportive, but they don't really give me ideas to bounce off. I have other fellow writers and creatives or that! And I do write everything down and go back to it in case I forget something. But typically speaking its all in my head, yep! I just...don't know how to do other things! Like...dress fashionably or...function in a normal society...you know useless stuff like that!

Zed. He needs a friend lol

Only with Bastard Warrior actually! Every story, I envision how I want it to end first, but with Bastard Warrior, I had thoughts of changing it because it was supposed to be enemies to lovers, yet the canon ending isn't Albus getting with Faith. So, I made 3 endings to appease everyone lol

Hope I got all of the them lol!

[ihni]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💖

Ooooh, how fun! <3 Thank you! I've gone through my fics and I'm gonna do 5+1, because why not, right? Seems fic approporiate, in a way. So, here goes:

Over the edge, 16K. (Because it's a scenario I've wanted to write for YEARS and I finally did, and I had a blast writing it! Muahaha!) “You’re still on probation. But if you behave this weekend, we might –“ “‘Behave’?” Billy snorted. “I’m not a dog, Henderson. What do you want me to do? Sit? Roll around? Be a good boy?” His voice was dripping with sarcasm, making Steve snort beside him. Dustin drew himself up to his very unimpressive height in the back seat, puffing out his chest. “Well you can start by not killing anyone!” “Ki– Jesus Christ, kid, I’m not gonna kill anyone!” “Well you almost killed Steve before –“ Here, Billy glanced over guiltily at Steve, who shook his head slightly as if to say it wasn’t a big deal, “– and you have a history of violence. You can’t fault us for making sure!” “Whatever.” “You promise?” “I can’t believe I’m doing this. Yes, kid, I promise I won’t kill anyone.”

Birthday boy, 8K. (Because I've never had so many people telling me a fic made them cry ... don't worry though, there are happier follow-ups!) Neil gives Max a benevolent nod. “You can go.” Max shoots up from her chair, a big smile on her face. “Really? Thank you, I –“ “You can go to the party, but not the sleepover. I want you home at eleven, at the latest.” Trying not to grimace, Max nods. It’s better than nothing. “And of course, Billy will go with you.” “What?”

At least an assist, 8K. (Because it's an alternate first meeting between our boys, and it was fun to imagine an opposite to a meet-cute - also Billy's tied up for most of it, which is always a plus!) “Dude,” he said, more baffled than angry. “Did you just try to bite me?” “I’ll do worse than that if you untie me,” Hargrove growled, as if making threats from the position he was in was somehow normal. “Yeah, because that makes me want to untie you,” Steve snarked back without thinking. Then he sighed and dragged a hand through his hair. He didn’t sign up for this shit. “Listen, yes this sucks, but it’s only for a couple of hours. Why don’t you just chill?” “I’ve been fucking kidnapped, you fuck! I’m supposed to play the finals right now, not kick back and relax while being fucking tied to a chair!” or Steve's teammates kidnap the opposing team's star player to secure a win in the finals. The star player in question is not impressed.

Fast and Frightening, 20K. (This whole fic was born from a chat about possessed cars, and because both me and DearDMVZ quite agreed that Billy would look very fetching tied to the hood of his Camaro while it's racing through the roads outside of Hawkins at night.) There's some seriously fucked-up shit going on. Billy crashed his car, was attacked by some kind of monster, escaped, ran into someone who looked just like him, punched that guy in the face, escaped again, and ended up on a random road somewhere outside of town. And now his own car has turned against him. In short, Billy's not having a good time.

Sleeping Beauty Retold, 8K. (Because I went to town on a fairytale AU and I really fucking like it, still.) Once upon a time, there was an evil king. The king married a woman who had magic, and used her to stay young and strong. To attain true immortality, though, he would have to sacrifice their child on the child's eighteenth birthday. Only, the queen thwarted the king's plans - she stoles the child away in the middle of the night and sent him away, to be raised far from the castle, so that he would be safe. The king never stopped looking. And one day, the child - who had grown up into a young man - was found.

Again and again and again and again, 4K. (Bonus fic, because if I'd had time I would have written 80K of this, I love the concept a LOT. Basically the boys being stuck in a time loop together.) It is Sunday, November 4th 1984, and it’s been Sunday, November 4th 1984 like, fifty-two times now. Fifty-four? Over fifty, at least. Billy’s lost count, which is depressing in itself.

[sundaywithoutgod]

One day im gonna make a trail of pickles and bananas to lure you to a big yummy bowl of Ramen… once you sit to eat is when I will pounce on you and have my fun. Muahaha ok that is all.

(Yes I will let you finish the food first, I’m not evil)

Y’know…that actually doesn’t sound bad at all. Pull this off, and you can do whatever you want to me. Whatever you want :))

(Thank you for letting me eat first too<3)

[inconcordia]

On Sunday's Villainy

I've seen various interpretations of Sunday by now and sometimes he's made out to be much sweeter than I see him and other times he's made out to be much more openly villainous than I see him. So I wanted to write down my thoughts on this - the ones I can presently think of, anyway.

First of all, I refer to him as villain because the Family is shady as all hell and he's somewhat presented as an opposing force to the protagonists we're supposed to identify with. That said, no one is the villain in their own story.

I don't see him as the muahaha kind of villain that will go out of his way to be evil. To me, he is the righteous kind of "villain" (if one even wants to call him a villain in the first place), which is arguably harder to deal with than the black and white fairytale type of villain. He doesn't see himself (/(his side) as the bad guy(s) nor is he interested in "doing bad things" or exploiting people for the sake of exploiting them (NOT TO SAY that the whole Dreamscape and whatever the family is doing isn't doing exactly that, but that's a whole other topic I need to expand on). Sunday acts with the certainty of someone who sees his own actions as justified and righteous - if you are threatening the family, the Harmony, THEIR dream, any harm that comes to you is verily justified. In that sense, he might consider an act heinous up until the very point you commit a crime so bad that this very same act becomes an acceptable punishment for you. Righteousness, when misguided, is a scary thing to go up against.

That said, I don't get violent or brutal vibes from him. He has wrath inside him (I'll make a separate post about this at some point) but he doesn't seem the type who would lash out physically. He won't strike you, he won't hurt you, he won't even carry a weapon. Something about him almost gives the impression that he still won't do so if someone were to physically assault him. Not to say he won't defend himself in some way if necessary, but I just feel like physical violence is not really in his nature (may be proven wrong on this, we'll see). Think of his scene with Sparkle, or even the last one with Gallagher. He's the most emotional we see him throughout in those scenes and yet physically he barely changes, in Sparkle's case he doesn't even make outright threats to get her to stop. He asks her to stop and leave, telling her she is not welcome.

Now that doesn't mean he is an innocent flower who will cry if you upset him and not retaliate. Not at all. He will harm you and he will end you, if necessary, but he will do so in a more indirect way. He will trick you, lead you into a corner you can't get out of anymore, make you put yourself in grave danger or even make you kill yourself (directly, through your actions, etc). He will sacrifice you in a way where you will realize it but can't do anything about it (exhibit A: Aventurine). Rather than poison your drink in secret, he will create a situation in which you have no other choice but drink it willingly and knowingly.

If you threaten the Family, him or their cause, he will remove you if he can but he would do so by means that don't leave a dirty trail or appear like treachery. He wants to remain in control of the situation and any retaliation or act of prevention should be seen as what it is: punishment for the wicked. It should be as clean as possible. No clean-up is ever perfect so rather than make a mess and fix it, he'll spin a web you get so caught up in you cut off your own air supply before you know it and if someone then asks questions he will point out the fact that he wasn't even standing near you.

To be continued.. possibly.

[diazsdimples]

Muahaha.

Buddie. Designated Survivor AU.

(Told you I am evil and that I also wanted any and all info. Forcing your hand. 🩵)

Evil. Evil evil human you KNOW I have a designated survivor AU SMH

Okay so this I haven't actually decided if I wanted it to be president!Buck and bodyguard!Eddie or president!Eddie and bodyguard!Buck or half a million other combinations but for the sake of this ask I'm gonna go with president!Buck and bodyguard!Eddie. This is very rough and if I do write a designated survivor AU, it won't be like this most likely, but will be similar.

Buck becomes president after the capitol is blown up and is immediately whisked off to the white house where he meets his security detail for the first time, headed by one Eddie Diaz. Initially Eddie isn't a huge fan of Buck because he's clearly way out of his depth and Eddie was sympathetic to the old president who passed away. But then he finds Buck having a panic attack due to his increased responsibilities and talks him down, and from there they become close friends

There's a brief scare at an address to the nation where a lone gunman fires on Buck and Eddie dives to save him, taking a round to the shoulder. He's immediately whisked off to hospital to have the bullet removed and Buck has another security guard cover him while he stays vigil by Eddie's bedside. When Eddie wakes he asks why Buck's stayed there the whole time and Buck tells him it's because he can't stand the idea of someone dying for him

After Eddie's recovered and been back in the job for a few months, he has to talk Buck down from going incognito to a vigil for the people who passed away in the explosion. Buck ignores him, because of course he does, and goes anyway and while he's there, someone recognises him and immediately a riot breaks out. Eddie, who was lurking because he was worried about Buck, grabs him and runs, taking him back to his house where he keeps Buck safe for a couple of hours. Buck meets Chris for the first time, who is in awe because the literal President of the USA is hiding in his lounge. Eddie sends Chris to his room and yells blue murder at Buck for going out even though he told him not to. Buck asks why he's so mad about it and Eddie yells "BECAUSE YOU COULD HAVE DIED" and then proceeds to yell about how he can't live without Buck and Buck's very ???? about the whole thing until he realises what Eddie's saying and admits that he's in love with Eddie too

They have a lot of dom/sub sex with dom!eddie and sub!buck. Buck at one point makes a quip about how the tables are turned that Buck's the one calling Eddie "sir" now even though he's the president and Eddie isn't.

It ends with another assassination attempt on Buck and Eddie's there to see the bullet graze Buck's cheek. He goes in the ambulance with Buck to the hospital and when they have a minute alone Eddie breaks down about nearly losing Buck again, and decides that's the moment to propose. Buck accepts because ofc he does, and agrees that he won't run for president in the upcoming election because he just wants a quiet life with Eddie and Christopher. Also, I've just remembered I didn't mention this, but Hen and Chim are both aides to the president (with Hen as Chief of Staff) and Bobby is his head of Communcations, with Athena as the General of the military

Send me an AU and I'll tell you 5 things that happen!!!

[poupeebotfan97]

THE LATEST IN VIRTUCON TECHNOLOGY:

With each meeting of Britain's most top secret agent! Each one of Dr. Evil's Fembot plans failed every time. Somehow, Austin Powers was able to easily out-seduce and destroy Frau’s Fembots with his powerful Mojo! Besides that time when Dr.Evil replaced his wife with a kamikaze Fembot bride, she missed killing him with her self-destruct explosion!  No matter! After 10 Fembot units, this newest Fembot #14 will be the one to rule them all! Complete with a mojo resistor, upgraded cooling fans, new seduction tactics, and quite the pair of jubblies that no man or woman could resist! Plus, model it after Sydney Sweeney, an American actress. One of the hottest women to ever exit!  The perfect bait for the degenerate Powers. Dr.Evil then clicks on his remote and activates this brand-new Fembot for the first time. It takes a second before she opens up her eyes, along with her chest plate. Simultaneously, her eyes and inside her chest plate glow (the Virtucon logo) a bright light blue!

She smiles: Sydney Fembot: Activation complete! Hello, Dr. Evil~ Care to have a little fun?—Just kidding! ;)  Has my time come to put an end to Mr. Powers? 

Dr.Evil: Yes, indeed it is! The question is, are you ready, my automated strumpet? 

Sydney Fembot: Yes, Dr.Evil. I am prepared to seduce and eliminate Mr. Powers once and for all!! 

Dr.Evil: Good Fembot, I like to see girls of that...caliber! Muahaha!

Sydney Fembot: Hun?

Dr.Evil: Sorry, I guess it doesn’t make sense this time around.. I thought to say that again for nostalgia. Anyhow, go now! Take down Austin Powers! 

Sydney Fembot walks away to her mission, her curvy hips moving side to side in a very alluring manner! Dr.Evil could not help it and stared at her ass; before snapping out and laughing at his newest creation! Nothing can stop her, not even Austin Powers this time…..

[seehowsupplethespineis]

So...EARTHSPARK! Let’s talk about EARTHSPARK!

First of all, I HECKING LOVED IT! Pretty much binged it all the second I had free time.

I thought I’d feel indifferent toward it, in all honesty. I’m usually not a fan of new characters introduced to a long-running franchise. Also, Optimus’s design really threw me and his voice is just...not good. I am in no way implying Alan Tudyk isn’t an awesome voice actor; he just doesn’t fit how I think Optimus should sound. Plus, I am never a fan of OG voice actors like Peter Cullen being passed up for the roles they literally created. All in all, I figured Earthspark would be a vaguely amusing romp that I probably wouldn’t rewatch. HOW WRONG I WAS.

Here’s a breakdown (heh, Breakdown) of why I love this show:

- It’s a refreshing take on the story we already know! Outside of the comics, no Transformers media has explored the aftermath of the Autobot-Decepticon war or what that could mean for Earth. The introduction of the Terrans fits into this theme perfectly and I am so excited to see what future role they’ll play in Transformer-human relations.

- THE ACTION. Listen, that fight scene in Age of Evolution Part 1 was LEGIT. I especially loved how we got to see the fight from the humans’ perspectives; very reminiscent of TFP. It made the danger feel so much more real and intense! Plus, the fight choreography throughout the show was so well planned-out and served to showcase each Transformers’ unique skills (like Twitch’s wind tunnels or Megatron freaking pinwheeling himself through the air).

- The new characters are so lovable!!! I absolutely adore Twitch and Thrash and cannot wait to get to know the three Terrans introduced in the finale (they’re already so personable). The human Maltos were just SO wholesome and honestly some of the best humans introduced in the whole franchise (if not the best). Alex is my favorite; I love dorky dads!!!

- It’s got that good family content! I love how the terrans and Robby and Mo all regard each other as siblings, even calling each other “big sis” and “little brother” and so forth. Dot and Alex were also so welcoming to their new “terran babies” and it just made me so happy! More wholesome family content, please!!!

- Speaking of the terrans, I’ve got to shout out our first canon non-binary Transformer, Nightshade!!! Maybe I’m being optimistic, but I really hope this opens the door for further trans representation outside of the comics. We need more trans and non-binary Transformers!!!

- This version of Megatron might actually be my favorite. As much as I love the purely evil G1 Megan or the maniacal warlord TFP Megan, I appreciate when Megatron is given a motive beyond “Muahaha, I will destroy you all!” I love that he was shown to actually care about the Decepticons who used to serve him and that he questioned G.H.O.S.T.’s actions when even Optimus didn’t (or didn’t want to).

- The inclusion of fan favorites was well-executed! Swindle, Wheeljack, Arcee, Elita One, and Soundwave all contributed something to the plot on top of just being their lovable selves! Oh, and Starscream’s cameo was quite exciting (especially since I immediately recognized Steve Blum’s voice).

- There’s a lot that still needs explaining. What is the connection between Mandroid and Alex? What are G.H.O.S.T.’s true motives? What’s Soundwave planning? I need to know!!!

This is all just to say that I am impatient for more episodes! In the meantime, I will attempt some fanfic!